A Family Outing?
by grimmkittylove
Summary: Sheena's running errands in Meltokio, and ends up helping Zelos babysit his little cousin. Naturally chaos ensues, and a secret is unwittingly revealed. [Sheelos, Colloyd.] T for safety


**A Family Outing?**

A **Tales of Symphonia** **Fanfic** by _Silverstar's Shadow_

xOxXxOx

**Me**: Hello!

**Zelos**: Why am I here instead of hanging out with my hunnies?

**Me**: Because Sheena told you to be here.

**Sheena** (appears): ZELOS! Say the freaking disclaimer already!

**Zelos**: Fine. Silver doesn't own us (except for Kiri), or Tales of Symphonia. She doesn't even own the laptop she's using to type this up!

**Me**: Quiet, you! Alas, what he is saying is true, though.

**Sheena**: Ooh, I have news! I'm--

**Me**: QUIET! Save it for the story!

**Zelos** (draws his sword and holds it up dramatically): On with the fic!

xOxXxOx

Sheena Fujibayashi was having a very pleasant day off. Her second-in-command, Orochi, was taking care of the village while she wandered around Meltokio, stopping in various shops and buying whatever struck her fancy. Life was good. Except for one little tiny problem, but it wasn't important. Okay, maybe it was, but right now, she was determined to enjoy her day. And enjoy it she did.

Until she quite literally ran into Zelos.

"OW!" The purple-clad ninja fell on her butt.

"Oh, hello, hunny!" The philanderer grinned. "To what do I owe the fortune of meeting you here?"

"I was shopping!" Sheena snapped, ignoring Zelos' outstretched hand and standing up, dusting herself off. "What are _you_ doing?"

"Babysitting," Zelos sighed, gesturing to a small, redheaded girl beside him, whom Sheena hadn't noticed. "Sheena, this is Kiri, my cousin."

Sheena's mood lightened. She loved kids.

"Hello, Kiri. I'm Sheena." The little girl nodded, and stuck her thumb in her mouth.

"Sheena, you like kids, right?" Sheena looked at him suspiciously.

"Yes, why?"

"Well, I was wondering if you'd like to help me baby-sit Kiri here. I can't get her to talk, so I have absolutely no idea what she wants." Zelos spread his arms in a 'help me' gesture, and Sheena sighed.

"I suppose. But it's a favor for Kiri. Not for you." Zelos nodded.

Sheena knelt down to toddler height, and looked kindly at the little girl. "Can you talk, Kiri?" Kiri nodded. "Are you going to tell me where you'd like to go today?" Another nod. "Where?"

"Toad Gesser."

Zelos looked confused. "What?"

"Toad Gesser!" Kiri repeated. "Whoosh! Watah. Wastubs."

"Toad Gesser… water that goes whoosh… washtubs… Thoda Geyser!" Sheena snapped her fingers. "She wants to ride the washtubs to Thoda Geyser!"

"How did you figure that out?" Zelos asked, looking amazed. Sheena shrugged uncomfortably.

"I'm pretty good at deciphering toddler-speak."

"I'll say," Zelos managed. "So, shall we take Miss Kiri here to the 'Toad Gesser'?"

"Why not?"

"Okay, then, to the Thoda Docks!"

xOxXxOx

"Toad Gesser."

"Yes, Kiri. We're going to Thoda Geyser."

"Wastubs."

"We're next in line for tickets."

"Now." The toddler looked up at Sheena with familiar crystal-blue eyes.

"Soon." Sheena turned to the strangely quiet ex-Chosen. "She looks like she could be your sister, Zelos. You have the same eyes." Zelos shrugged.

"Is something wrong?" Sheena asked quietly.

"Nah," Zelos answered. "Just a little tired."

Sheena eyed him suspiciously. "You're never tired. Where's the red-headed bundle of energy I know and love?"

Zelos perked up. "Right here, hunny!" He hugged her. Sheena's eyes bugged out.

"Zelos!" SMACK!

"Ow…" Zelos sighed. "What'd I do this time?"

Sheena didn't say anything, just turned back to Kiri, who was staring at her with wide eyes.

"Sheenas hitted Cuzzy Zels." Suddenly, the toddler started to giggle madly. "Sheenas siwee."

Zelos chuckled nervously. "That's right, Kiri. Sheena hit Cousin Zelos." At the look on his face, Sheena couldn't hold back her mirth any longer. She burst out laughing.

The three of them stood there, laughing their heads off in front of the entire line. The clerk cleared her throat and snapped the adults out of it, but Kiri kept on giggling. Sheena took out her purse to pay for the washtubs, and handed the clerk the Gald needed. The woman looked over at the still-laughing toddler, and rummaged through the drawers, producing a form, which she handed to Sheena.

"I'll need Mom or Dad to sign here."

Sheena blushed. "Oh, no, we're not--! I mean, she's not… I mean--"

Zelos sighed and took the paper from Sheena, producing a pen to fill it out, then signed his name with a flourish. "Here you go ma'm."

The clerk looked it over. "Oh, Zelos Wilder!" She turned to Sheena. "You're one lucky woman, Mrs. Wilder."

Sheena snapped. "I'm not Mrs. Wilder! My name is Sheena Fujibayashi, and I'm helping this _idiot_ baby-sit his cousin!" The whole room went quiet.

"I-I--!" The clerk was at a loss for words. "I see. Thank you for your business, Mr. Wilder and Ms. Fujibayashi. Have a nice day." Without acknowledging the woman further, Sheena took Kiri's hand and walked out of the building, leaving a confused and half-deaf Zelos to trail behind.

"What was that all about, hunny? It would've been easier to just play along." Zelos shut up when Sheena shot him a death glare as she jumped into one of the washtubs.

"If I'd played along, it wouldn't take more than an hour before everyone in the worlds would hear about 'Mrs. Wilder' visiting Thoda Docks with her husband and child."

"But then we'd _have_ to get married, hunny! Wouldn't that be wonderful?" he asked, climbing into the other washtub.

Sheena glared at him again as she helped Kiri into hers. "It would be decidedly _not_ wonderful, Zelos."

The redheaded ex-Chosen pulled a wounded face. "That hurts, Sheena. It really does." He sniffed dramatically.

"Oh, come off it, you idiot Chosen."

"_Ex_-Chosen, my voluptuous hunny," Zelos corrected.

"Sorry."

"Toad Gesser." Sheena looked down at the toddler. Kiri was staring at something in the distance.

"That's it, Kiri!" Sheena said. Kiri clapped.

"Toad Gesser! Kiri, Sheenas and Cuzzy Zels goesing to Toad Gesser!"

"That's right, kid!" Zelos shouted.

Sheena laughed. Kiri looked away from the geyser to gaze up at Sheena with large crystal blue eyes. "We gonna havs funs?"

"Yes, Kiri," Sheena said with a smile. "We're gonna have loads of fun."

xOxXxOx

Thoda Geyser looked a bit different from the last time Sheena had been there. For one thing, the mana bridge was now a real marble bridge. There was also a sign reading; 'Undine's Café: FunFoodFamily. Specialty Seafood.'

"Weird," Sheena muttered. "She opened a restaurant without telling me?"

"Cool," Zelos said. "Let's go there!"

"Knowing her, it's bound to be expensive," Sheena retorted.

"I've got the cash," the ex-Chosen reminded her.

"Mes hungaries." The adults looked down at the toddler.

"Well, that's settled then." Zelos put his hands together. "To Undine's Café!" Sheena took one of Kiri's hands, Zelos took the other, and the three marched together across the bridge.

"Welcome to Undine's Café. A table for two and a booster seat?" the hostess asked, sounding somewhat bored.

"Yes please." The girl looked up at Zelos' voice and gave a fangirl squee.

"Oh my freaking Goddess it's ZELOS WILDER!" Every girl in the restaurant looked up and screeched, moving at what seemed like light speed to surround Zelos, Sheena, and Kiri.

"Master Zelos!"

"Zelos!"

"Is that your girlfriend?"

"Ew, dump _her_. Take me instead!"

"Master Zelos!"

"Hey, back off!" Sheena roared. The crowd of fangirls froze, and turned as one to snarl at her, like a pack of very, _very_ angry cats.

"Ladies, please. Leave Ms. Fujibayashi and me alone. Can't you see there are _children_ present?" Kiri chose that moment to tug on Sheena's skirt.

"Sheenas I'm hungaries." The fangirls backed away, clearly reluctant to keep the redheaded toddler from her meal.

"Your seats are ready, Master Zelos." Catching Sheena's glare, she added, "and Ms. Fujibayashi." Kiri whined again.

"We can eat in a minute, Kiri."

"Now."

"Soon," Sheena promised.

When they reached their table, Zelos unexpectedly pulled out Sheena's chair for her and bowed dramatically. "Your seat, milady." The redhead grinned.

"Thanks you, Zelos," Sheena said grandly, sitting Kiri in her booster seat, then sitting down in the proffered chair. "You're very kind."

"Anything for you." Sheena nearly burst out laughing at the expression on the waitress's face.

Zelos sat down in the other chair, handing Sheena one of the menus and picking up the other.

The waitress looked Sheena over and sneered slightly. "So, Ms. Fujibayashi. When's the baby due?"

Zelos looked up abruptly. "She's not pregnant."

Sheena didn't look up from her menu. "Six months." Zelos' jaw dropped. The girls around them glared daggers at the pair.

"Wha?"

"Oh." The waitress seemed a bit put out. "That's nice. What can I get you two?"

"Water, and a chicken salad. No tomatoes. And the children's whitefish with mashed potatoes for Kiri."

"A strong brandy, please," Zelos gasped. "And the roasted swan, with shrimp on the side." The waitress nodded, then turned and stalked back to the kitchen.

"I thought you said you weren't going to play along!" Zelos exclaimed.

Sheena laughed dryly. "I wasn't playing along."

Zelos sweatdropped. "And… I didn't know this because--?"

"I didn't feel like telling you."

"So… when did this-- ahem-- happen?"

"Remember Lloyd's 18th birthday party?" Zelos nodded, confusedly. Sheena glared at him. "You drugged my wine."

"Oh, yeah, that _was_ three months ago, wasn't it?" Sheena nodded. "Best night of my life," Zelos announced with a grin. The fangirls glared harder.

"Well, on that pleasant note, I have to go. To the bathroom," she added when Zelos looked confused. "Watch Kiri."

"Right-o, Mrs. Wilder." Sheena glared dangerously as she stood, then walked away. Zelos turned to his little cousin, mostly to avoid the fangirls'-- and Sheena's-- furious gazes.

"Hey, Kiri." The little girl blinked.

"Mes hungaries."

"Yeah, I know." The food arrived just then. "Wow, this place is quick," Zelos muttered. He absentmindedly jabbed a piece of breaded squid onto his fork and fed it to Kiri.

"There, now will you be quiet?"

Kiri chewed curiously. "Waddisit?"

"Huh? Oh, swan," he replied.

Kiri looked down at her own plate. "No sawn." The toddler sniffed.

"What?"

The little redhead sniffed again, then jumped out of the high chair, sat down on the ground, and started bawling her eyes out. "SAWN!"

Zelos looked down at her with wide, hopeless eyes, aware that every girl in the place was staring at him. "What is it?"

"_Sawn_!" Kiri yowled, crying harder.

"Calm down, kid, please?"

"ME WANT SAWN!"

"What's sawn? Wand, pond, saw… sawn, sawn… sword!" Zelos roared triumphantly. "She wants my sword!" The ex-Chosen drew the saber, and held it out to the toddler.

"See, it's Excalibur, Kiri!"

"Waaaahhhh!"

Just then, Sheena walked out of the bathroom.

"ZELOS WILDER, WHAT IN UNDINE'S NAME DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING?!?!?" She raced over to the table, murder in her eyes.

Zelos held his sword up defensively. "She was saying something like saw, so, I thought she meant sword. But apparently, I was wrong."

Sheena sighed, and knelt down to Kiri's height. "What did you want, sweetie?"

Kiri sniffed. "Sawn." She pointed at Zelos' plate.

The purple-clad ninja looked up at Zelos exasperatedly. "She wants your swan, you idiot."

"Hey, now, is that any way to speak to the father of your baby?"

Sheena blushed. "Just give her the swan meat. I'm sure that whitefish will be delicious."

The pair sat back down, after placing Zelos' swan on Kiri's tray, and proceeded to eat their meal. Suddenly, Colette burst out of the kitchen, tripped, then spotted them. She quickly got back up, waving madly.

"Sheena, Zelos, hey!" the other ex-Chosen squealed. The blonde made her way over to their table, miraculously not tripping again.

"What're you two doing here? Who's that with you? Why are those girls glaring at you?"

Sheena smiled sweetly. "Zelos, honey, why don't _you_ answer?"

Zelos beamed at the sound of the word 'honey' coming out of her mouth, then froze when she got to 'answer.' "Umm, okay, _hunny._ Well, Colette, this is Kiri, who we're babysitting, and she wanted to come here, because she was hungry." He mumbled the rest.

Sheena kicked him under the table.

"I didn't catch the last part," Colette said, oblivious.

"Um, well…"

"Say it so she can hear you, Zelos, sweetie." Sheena positively beamed.

"Well, Sheena's, um, well, that is to say, for lack of a better term, preggers."

"Oh, Sheena, that's wonderful!" Colette exclaimed, then frowned. "But-- why would they be mad?"

Sheena sighed and slapped her forehead. "Because Zelos is the father, Colette."

A look of understanding crossed the blonde's face. "Oh, lots of girls like him, don't they? That's why they're mad."

Zelos buried his face in his hands.

"Lloyd will be so happy for you when he hears!" Sheena and Zelos exchanged a horrified glance.

"Um, yeah."

"Well, I have people to serve! See you around! We can throw a party for you, like the one we had for Lloyd's birthday!" With that, the blonde ex-Chosen bounced away, tripped over air, then continued to her table.

As soon as she was gone, Sheena moaned and put her head in her hands. "How are we going to tell the others?"

Zelos looked confused. "Whaddya mean? We don't have to. Colette'll see to it that everyone knows."

"Oh, yeah."

"Nummy sawn." The adults turned to Kiri, who had finished her meal. "Mes no hungaries no more."

"That's good," Zelos said. He looked down at his plate. "I'm not real hungry either, hunny."

"Well, I am," Sheena declared, and proceeded to eat her meal _and_ Zelos' (except for the brandy, which the redheaded ex-Chosen downed in two gulps.) When the ninja finished, Zelos paid the bill and the threesome hi-tailed it out of the restaurant.

"Come back soon!" Colette called from the hostess's station. "It was nice seeing you two! Congrats!" Zelos moaned.

As the three walked over the bridge, Kiri tugged on Sheena's hand and pointed at Zelos.

"Cuzzy Zels is walking funnys." Sheena turned to look at him, and it was true-- the redhead was swaying slightly as he walked

"Cousin Zelos had something funny to drink," Sheena explained. Kiri nodded knowingly. Zelos glared at the two girls.

"I needed to get over the shock," he complained. "It's not every day that you find out you're a father." Kiri giggled, then turned her attention to the geyser.

"Toad Gesser!" the little girl squealed. "Preety! Whoosh!"

"That's right," Sheena said. Zelos smiled.

"It's great to see you two having fun," the redhead said. Sheena giggled and flashed Zelos a wide grin. The ex-Chosen's eyes widened in concern. "Wait, you're not gonna get all fangirly on me now, are you?"

"Of course not," Sheena replied, still smiling.

"Good, cause that's what I like about you," Zelos explained. "You don't act like the rest of my stalkers." The black-haired ninja frowned.

"Stalker?"

Zelos backpedaled. "You're _not_ one of my stalkers, yeah, that's what I meant. Hehe."

Sheena looked satisfied, then giggled again. Zelos' eye twitched.

"Could you stop that? It's freaking me out."

"Oh, sorry." So saying, Sheena pulled a straight face. "I apologize, oh mighty ex-Chosen, for giggling in your presence." Zelos laughed.

"Preety gesser!" The adults looked away from each other and turned to Kiri. The little girl was on the edge of the ravine, having climbed under the fence. She seemed like she was about to jump down.

"KIRI!" Zelos and Sheena shouted together, racing over to the fence.

"You go get her!" Sheena screeched.

"Why can't you?"

"I'm _pregnant, _idiot!"

"Oh, yeah." Zelos smacked his forehead.

"GO ALREADY!"

"Goddess," the ex-Chosen muttered as he made his way through the crowd to the fence. "Are all pregnant women so bad-tempered?"

"Yes," a lady near him answered. "And she'll only get worse. First time, dear?"

"Yep. But I'm kinda in a hurry, I gotta save that kid over there." He pointed.

"Oh, we'll save this chat for later, then, dearie. Have fun on your rescue mission!"

"OH MY GODDESS, ZELOS IS GOING TO SAVE THAT BABY!" a fangirl squeed.

A flock of girls stampeded and pushed everyone out of Zelos' way.

"Um… thanks?"

"Oh, you're welcome, Master Zelos!"

"Oh Goddess, he THANKED me!"

"He thanked ALL of us, you twit!"

"Whatever!"

"There he goes, over the fence!" Several cameras appeared out of nowhere, and the girls started frantically taking pictures.

"Yo, easy on the flash! I can't save her if my beautiful eyes are blinded!" The non picture-takers started screeching at the offenders.

"You're interfering with Master Zelos' rescue mission! DIE!"

Zelos sighed and shook his head as he scooped Kiri up, just as she was about to jump down. The little girl started crying.

"Mes just wanted to sees the gesser, Cuzzy Zels. Waaaahh!" Zelos shushed her.

"We'll get you a nice postcard, don't worry, then you can see it every day, okay?"

Kiri nodded tearfully. "Mkay Cuzzy Zels."

"Now, lets get back to Sheena, okay? We don't want her to worry." Zelos smiled.

"Okays."

"Ooh, Master Zelos, you were wonderful!"

"You're so brave!"

"Aww, isn't that little girl cute?"

"Yeah, she looks just like him!" They all started giggling.

"BACK OFF, YOU MOOCHERS!" Sheena yelled, barging her way through the crowd. "And YOU!" She glared at the redheaded ex-Chosen. "YOU'RE GIVING THEM FREE REIN!"

"Calm down, hunny. If you haven't noticed, I haven't said a word to anyone but Kiri since they started blinding me." Sheena opened her mouth as if to say something, but no sound came out.

"You getting a little possessive, there, Sheena?" Zelos smirked.

Sheena crossed her arms. "…"

"It's because she's pregnant, dearie," the old lady from before said kindly. Sheena went red. Zelos nodded, comprehension dawning on his face.

"Oh…"

"So you might want to call off that crowd of nice girls over there before she slaughters them all. I'm sure they'd be missed."

"Oh, okay." Zelos turned to the crowd.

A girl squeed. "He's looking at me!"

"Okay, ladies," he began, catching their attention. "Go away, mkay? I don't need crowds following me while I'm spending quality time with my lovely, bad tempered, _pregnant _girlfriend, mkay?" Some of the girls looked mutinous, but they all walked away, leaving Zelos, Sheena, Kiri, and the old lady alone.

"Well, that was interesting," came an oddly familiar voice from behind them. Zelos and Sheena spun around to see who had spoken.

"Raine?" Sheena gasped.

"I came to study beyond the artifacts behind the restaurant that may prove that this used to be the site of an ancient city, but I got a more interesting show, and a most intriguing specimen," the ruin-maniac explained, eying Sheena speculatively. "A Chosen that's lived long enough to breed, and with a human. Perhaps the result will be similar to what happened when Anna and Kratos had Lloyd, or completely different." Zelos put a protective arm around Sheena's waist.

"Ah, no, professor, you won't be studying my hunny."

The silver-haired half-elf looked a bit deflated, but smiled anyways.

"It was worth a shot."

Sheena shook her head and laughed. The professor left soon, apologizing for not being able to chat. As the three looked over the geyser at the setting sun, the black-haired ninja sighed contentedly. No matter what the hectic days ahead might bring, she'd have this memorable day, as eventful as it was, to remind her that there was something good about a family outing once in a while.

xOxXxOx

A/N: Version 2- I fixed the spelling errs I found, and I need to give some credit to my buddy Aaron! I totally forgot that he helped me with the writing on this one! Sorry, Aaron, but it's here now:D


End file.
